Well, here goes nothing!

I’m not very good at socializing or trusting, so this is a very big step for me to ask for assistance and throw my hopes and dreams out into the world.

Some background first.

Back in 2009 I started Lurv Spanking as an anonymous outlet to write stories and commentary about spanking, specifically the psychology ‘behind’ the reasons so many people like spanking. I mentioned spanking on my real-name blog that I started in 2006 from time to time and discovered many, if not a majority, of my readers were fellow spankos. None of the other six blogs I was curating in 2009 fit the precise requirements so Lurv Spanking was born.

In late 2006 I wrote a short story and emailed it to a blogging friend. She read it and immediately wrote back saying I had to turn the story into a full-length novel. I posted that first chapter on my real-name blog, then several more until all my readers told me to take it down and write the novel. I did so, mostly at work, and in 2007 self-published my novel under my real name. Back then, it was called vanity publishing and the many epublishers and media platforms did not yet exist. It didn’t sell because I didn’t bother promoting it except on my blogs and I had given a free copy to all my most loyal readers. Then in Sept. 2009, I wrote a short story here on Lurv Spanking and again the same thing happened. Readers told me to take it down and write a novel. So I did, pecking away at it for a year and writing 60,000 words.

Then, the hard drive crashed… twice and we had to buy a replacement computer. I had neglected to back up the Word doc and it was gone. Luckily… I was in the habit of printing out each page as it was finished, so I had a hard copy at least. By 2012 I was done with blogging. My main blog was getting up to 200 spam comments a day and I was tired of writing. I walked away from all seven blogs and didn’t come back until the month of July, 2016. My manuscript was dusty and the thickness was intimidating. But I remembered in the forward to The Lord of The Rings, J.R.R Tolkien describing how it took 13 years to finish the manuscript and then having to type and re-type it all over again when it was done. I’m not in his class of writer – few are – but I can type if I have the time and inclination.

Starting over.

So on June 29, 2016 I wrote a completely new prologue to my spanking novel and then started, page by page to reenter every word I’d written over six years ago. [I wasn’t able to scan with OCR software – I tried several – because our computer OS is too old] I finished July 29, 2016 with a total of 70,000 words adding 10,000 new words and changing the entire novel from 1st person past and present, to 3rd person past and 1st person present. As of now, I have to write at least another 40,000 words to complete the novel, all new plots and scenarios. This time I have a copy here on this blog, a Word doc on my computer, a hard copy and a flash drive backup. The characters are still mulling over how they want the novel to end. They have a fairly detailed outline blocked out but nothing is solid yet. That’s the problem sometimes when you want to write one way and the character(s) come back and say ‘Spanking without any sex? Ever? I don’t think so. This is what you’re going to write.’

Below is a trial synopsis for a potential back cover – presuming of course it ever is printed – based on the arc of the story lines. I had not intended to write an erotic spanking novel at all, only spanking but as above the characters wanted to have sex and who was I to say no. My style of writing is to slowly introduce characters one by one by using mostly dialog rather than internal monologue. In fact, in the prologue no names are used and Kitten’s name is not revealed until chapter two, the title character’s name until midway of chapter two and the third female character until chapter four. I also switch back and forth between past and present as DJ is relating the story to his wife. One of the interesting things about observation is that no two people remember the same event the same way. I’ve tried to capture this by having all the characters knowing something about everybody, but nobody knowing everything about anybody and mostly what they think they know is incorrect. The only one who knows everything is the reader but even then, there are many secrets not revealed until the very end.

Still writing and hope to be done by the end of the month.

This however is not a typical story. Here on this blog I try to write happy spanking stories where all the characters are having fun and being silly at times. My novels explore the darkness and are painful for me to write. They touch on all sorts of triggers for both me and my readers. Sometimes I get so angry at what my characters are going through I want to punch the screen. Other times my eyes are so filled with tears of joy I can’t see. I’ve been denying myself for years the fact that I have to write. I sit at the keyboard and they start narrating their lives to me. My characters want to live. They want to be remembered and celebrated. They want you to know that when you read their story, you will cry, laugh, scream, be aroused and be sad but will never be comfortable.

DJ used to be a college bad boy running with a pack of affluenza hellions reveling in a hedonistic lifestyle of sex, spanking and bondage with willing victims. After earning a Master’s degree he meets the love of his life and is happily married in a burgeoning D/s relationship and Dominant to Kitten when it all starts to fall apart. Very curious to know more about his past submissive conquests as she’s still trying to decide how much dominance she desires, Kitten awakens the monster DJ thought he had suppressed for good. As he takes her submission deeper and deeper into the lifestyle of BDSM the punishments and explicit sexual training become more severe as devastating secrets are revealed from his past. The narrative unfolds simultaneously five years apart with DJ as the protagonist in both timelines and then the past and present collide when he comes face-to-face with the women he thought he’d ruined and lost forever. Will they forgive him or have they come seeking revenge? Will Kitten continue to roll over and submit or will her claws come out? Starring three strong women and one sadistic man, Breaking Grace is a lyrical and powerful erotic novel exploring many aspects of BDSM and LGBT while acknowledging both the devastation of past abuse and the power of faith and redemption within a D/s relationship between survivors. The reader’s beliefs and expectations will be challenged at every turn of the page.

So having written all this, I would like some advice from my current readership. Number one is I am seeking a beta reader(s) who would be willing to proofread the manuscript in several ways. I do not have anyone in real life who I can ask to be a beta reader.

1. Grammar and styling.
2. Continuity.
3. Genuineness of sex and punishment scenes.
4. Story flow in terms of readability.
5. Character development.
6. Overall plot believability.

I would also greatly appreciate feedback from published authors about the platforms they currently use and which ones to avoid although I’ve checked several and they don’t fit with the scope of this novel since this a male narrator and set in present day. Not to mention, the story doesn’t fit any one genre but bounces through many archetypes. On the other hand, I love this novel and am very proud of my efforts. If you would like to offer assistance then please contact me at my email address, lurvspanking@gmail.com and I will get back to you. I can’t offer any compensation except my grateful thanks for your readership and reciprocal beta reading.

Sincerely,
LS